Ep # 31: Courageous Conversations with Jane Blaufus
16 years into 25-year career in the insurance industry, Jane’s 39-year-old husband was killed in a plane crash. She decided to share her story to help families avoid what she went through and to effect change. She encourages everyone to have courageous conversations. Courageous conversations may take you out of your comfort zone but help they help us to understand and come to decisions about what is most important to us. Jane reminds us that it doesn’t have to be a scary conversation – it just has to be a conversation.
Jane, a keynote speaker business coach, and best-selling author of “With the [Stroke] of a Pen” believes that we have an obligation to ourselves and to those we love to make sure we leave this world in an organized manner, and she has the background and the experience to help people achieve this.
This podcast is a great follow-up to Ep # 29 “Executor Help” with David Edey.
What You’ll Learn in Today’s Episode:
How to get courageous conversations started – it doesn’t have to be scary; it just must be a conversation.
Enlisting the help of your advisor or third party to facilitate the conversation
Have a vision for your retirement and communicate it effectively with those who are important to you.
Be organized and communicate where important documents are to assist family and friends after your passing.
Ideas Worth Sharing:
“I found out the hard way that I wasn’t as prepared as I thought I should have been. I thought, okay, with all my education, expertise, designations and experience, if I was blindsided, what would the average person go through if something happened to them?”
“Courageous conversations are conversations that take you outside of your comfort zone. They are conversations that are meant to come to some decisions about things, not just to leave things dangling because sometimes people don’t like to make the decision. The courage comes in when you have to make a decision.”
“What is it that you both want? I think some of the things you really need to talk about is what does my vision of retirement look like? Because sometimes you’re not on the same page. I find that some people think they are on the same page, but they haven’t had the conversation to confirm whether they are or not.”
“I have young people who tell me I can’t get my parents to talk to me about anything. They just won’t tell me anything. I ask them and they won’t talk to me about what’s going on. One of the things I recommend is a family meeting. Sit down with your family and have a conversation.”
Resources in Today’s Episode
Contact Jane: mailto:info@theblaufusgroup.com
Courageous Conversations with Jane Blaufus
Jane Blaufus encourages everyone to have courageous conversations.
Firstly, they take you out of your comfort zone. Secondly, they also help us to understand and come to decisions about what is most important to us. Most importantly, a courageous conversation doesn’t need to be a scary conversation – it just needs to be a conversation.
Jane was in the insurance industry for 25 years. 16 years into her career, her 39-year-old husband was killed in a plane crash. Luckily, the year before Jane and her then-husband’s wills had been updated and they had bought more life insurance. Jane thought she was prepared. However, she found out the hard way she wasn’t.
Consequently, she was blindsided by her husband’s death. Jane realized that even with her education, expertise, designations, and experience she was not ready. That is to say, what would the average person go through?
Subsequently, Jane decided to share her family’s story. She notices that when she shares her story, people are very kind, however, they walk away. As a result, Jane wants to use her story and her abilities to affect real change. Ultimately, she wants people to realize that they need to pre-plan. She wants to get courageous conversations started and views herself as a catalyst for courageous conversations, at whatever stage of life.
Starting a Courageous Conversation
Above all, most courageous conversations start internally. Firstly, it means getting our own priorities straight first. Secondly, it means figuring out our own priorities and sharing them with the people closest to us. Finally, it can also mean making the move to engage the proper professionals to assist. She recommends working with someone like a financial advisor because they are an impartial third party who can guide conversations, and offer guidance, explanations, and expertise.
For example, Jane shares that a lawyer who uses her book and its checklist reached out to let her know that he has started to use it in his estate planning and retirement planning process. He was sick and tired of families tearing each other apart across his boardroom table.
Engaging a Planning Professional
Bridging generational gaps – and having those crucial conversations – can be a result of engaging a planning professional. For example, it is important that the next generation understands the older generation’s wishes. In her work, Jane often encounters a younger generation who find they can’t get their parents to talk to them about their wishes. In instances like these, Jane recommends a family meeting. Moreover, she advises everyone to sit down as a family. Holidays can be a good time to arrange especially when people are coming in from all over. She recommends that even though it may be a difficult time to arrange a family meeting, it can be incredibly beneficial to carve out this time and brave the discomfort.
Make that Difficult Decision
Finally, a courageous conversation is a conversation that takes you outside of your comfort zone. They may be tense. But they’re meant to come to a decision. They’re the conversations we don’t want to have but need to have, for everybody to be on the same page.
Jane Blaufus, keynote speaker business coach, and best-selling author of “With the [Stroke] of a Pen” believes that we have an obligation to ourselves and to those we love. Our obligation is to make sure we leave this world in an organized manner, and she has the background and the experience to help people achieve this.
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